I know… this was a Paradoxal Easter

Easter is a time, where I look forward to the Easter egg hunt in my backyard, and the basket of random goodies, and cute outfits that the Easter bunny, so choosingly picks out for me. However, this year, I was staying at Greg’s, so the Easter bunny had to postpone any such plans (he wouldn’t know where to find me in Norfolk.

While staying at Greg’s, his family said they were going to mass with his grandmother. After dating him 4 years, they have never been to mass. So I figured this would be a good opportunity to score some brownie points and get a Catholic experience, and to start off Easter in a righteous, and religious manner.

I texted my family, telling them I would be late for celebrations due to the mass. The responses that I got were straight from the heart, and came from life experiences of others in a Catholic ceremony. It truly meant a lot that my family was so concerned about my decision to attend this mass and offered such profound advice:

My mom replied saying, “Just know that when they go up to get communion you have to stay seated. you might feel weird sitting there while everyone else goes up.. but its no big deal.  especially on Easter  there are probably a lot of other heathens visiting too. just dont text during the service even if it is a text from jesus. who knows, you might like the formality and pageantry of a catholic church. at least they believe in something . plus.. the easter hymns are usually really upbeat and celebratory. and the little kids look soooo cute all dressed up. ”

I then ask her what religion we are, since greg’s grandmother asked, and I of course, had not the slightest idea. she replies, ” rastafarian. No you were baptized protestant congregationalist”. When i texted her it was over she said, “have you found the way of god?”. Her comments were all in sincerest sacrcasm, since she understands my views on religion, and also in making light of the situation.

My cousins reply was: “dad  (my uncle) requests that you pray for us! its an up down up down ceremony. wear comfy shoes. dad requests that you count how many times you stand and sit… and according to him the waifer tastes like shit. lovely”!

I am glad that my family supports my potential of switching to catholicsm. After my experience I do not feel more or less enlightened, perhaps culturally enriched, and also the feeling that I really didn’t miss out on THAT much by not going to CCD.

It seemed like CCD was such a large part of growing up, everyone knew everyone from there- they met new people- you were COOL if you went to CCD. That’s where so many people got their first boyfriends. I have a vivid memory of sitting on the bus with my best neighborhood friend, and she was in tears because she had her first confession, and we were trying to figure out what she had done wrong, and needed to confess (stealing Bobby’s jellybeans, or wearing her school clothes to play outside). Anyways, I always envied the Catholics. I always wondered… what goes on there? The whole concept seemed so obscure, mysterious, fun and new.

Well, going with gregs family, they stood and sat about 9 times, some of them for like 9 or 10 minutes. Thankfully i wore my comfy shoes. Thankfully, my Uncle warned me about all of this. The service wasn’t all that different from what I expected. They mentioned jesus about 93209384 times more than my church, and didn’t necessarily sing as harmoniously as my experiences. However, it is safe to say that with the respect of my family, as well as their sincerest advice, I (happily) survived my first Catholic experience.

But don’t expect me to be going to my first confession any time soon!


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